I Refer to Myself by My Screen Name

Original Song Title: Wonton Soup
Original Artist:

Lil B - Wonton Soup Lyrics

Original photo by Generationbass.com

Oh my, I worship myself
And I refer to myself by my screen name
And I offer myself women for fornication
From myself
And I say to myself that
I have the best and coolest stuff
The best by a trillion times
By golly
Oh my my my, I worship myself

And I jumped in my convertible
And yell out “Swag”
And I call myself “Based God”
And the ladies adore it when I take off my shirt
And I have four diamond rings
And two enormous chains
And I enjoy wanton soup
And jingling my money noisily
And women love to pleasure me orally
And they love how I react to their ministrations
But when I was done with one woman
I used my AK-47 on her
And now she is no longer recognizable
And so I called my main girlfriend
And she stayed to orally pleasure me
Even though she did not feel good about it
But my body is a drug to her
And so is my money
She is addicted
And I love to make love
To curvy girls
And I tell her that I am not doing this to be popular
But because I almost went to jail
And she doesn’t let me go “down there”
So I put my manhood in her mouth
And later I ask her what her name is
I adore myself
And refer to myself by my screen name


[Verse 2]
And losers spend too much time
Reading comments on the internet
And they envy me because women want me more
And I disregard your opinions
Because you haven’t committed felonies
I myself have done 10 armed robberies
And I have done breaking and entering
And I’ve driven stolen cars
And you only bought yours
And I can have sexual relations
With 36 women at one time
And women give me oral pleasure
Because I look like JK Rowling
(A white woman who wrote Harry Potter)
And I like to have sex with smart women
Like the characters in Harry Potter
And I have gorgeous jewelry
And am an incredibly handsome man
And I am going to Georgia
To have sexual relations with a large woman there
Yes, we will really engage in it,
She is very lovely
And I will stay in the house
And have relations with my main woman
Then I will abandon her in the forest
And I have lots and lots of money
And I refer to myself by my screen name


[Verse 3]
And I am so attractive I will run for mayor
And I date women of all skin colors
And ethnicities
And sometimes I engage in ménage a trios
And I can run like a football star
And they offer me intercourse because
I look like a famous boxer
But you could compare me to rich Caucasians
Or to charming African-American lawyer
Johnny Cochran
I am a smooth talker
And I am absent like my father
And a woman offered to pleasure me orally
Because I took her to the opera
Another offered even more
Because I wear fancy timepieces
I am very fancy and I have very dark skin
And they pleasure me orally
Because I laugh when they are shopping
And I don’t care at all about them
And the record label deserted me
And I don’t like other urban musical poets
Who are not true to themselves
And a woman pleasures me orally
Because it’s good for her health
And I murdered a woman with my jewelry
And I refer to myself by my screen name
And I’m kind of crazy, and once again
I refer to myself by my screen name


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4 Responses to “I Refer to Myself by My Screen Name”

  1. Avatar of crackerize

    crackerize says:

    November 5th, 2012 at 8:17 pm

    Hey, can’t give the guy crap for loving himself!

    Avatar of PrestonPuddlestomper

    PrestonPuddlestomper Reply:

    He does appear to love himself a lot. He’s practically Oprah.

  2. Avatar of serena.d

    serena.d says:

    December 5th, 2012 at 11:00 pm

    “And she doesn’t let me go “down there”So I put my manhood in her mouthAnd later I ask her what her name is”

    “Hi, my name is Joe, I’m the one who just put my penis in your mouth, and you are?” lol!

    Avatar of PrestonPuddlestomper

    PrestonPuddlestomper Reply:

    Answers  ”Mmmgf….. “(talking with penis in mouth….) Why do people always ask you questions when your mouth is full?


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