A Compendium of Useful Advice

[Verse 1: Drake]
Get it through your thick skulls!
I am extremely impressive!
I’m so rich people pretend they knew me when
Go Uptown where the fancy fashion is
New York City, seriously!
The Spanish girls love me like I’m a Dominican boy band
Like I’m a huge mall near Miami
Tell Luther Campbell I’m in Miami, too
“Luke” didn’t mention me with other Miami rappers
And that really hurt my feelings
I’m bored with my active lifestyle
Dancing, having sex, I’m over it and so very bored
But I’ve got pricey sparkly jewelry on my wrist
And a condo on Biscayne Boulevard
A very impressive address, I might add
In case you hadn’t heard. Thought you should know
And I still like cheap neighborhood girls for sexual services
So how are you? What’s your opinion? Are you impressed?
I’m 25-years old with 25 million dollars (woah!)
I’m in the building, and my senses are magnified by Ecstasy
Rest in Peace, Mac Dre, I’ll do it here in your memory
But I’m making money, and I’ll keep on until the money stops
I’m on the winning team, with or without a mascot
“Lil Wayne, please pass me a funny cigarette just like a relay baton”
We’re the coolest, but you’re like the Village People
(With all of the homosexuality that implies, by the way)
Hanging out with DJ Franzen and Mally Mall at my house
And lest I forget, Niko, J, and Chubbs, and last but not least, Gibbo
Drinking expensive Italian wine by the liter
She knows I just use her for sex, and it implies nothing
Is that truly your opinion? Are you telling me how you really feel?
Because the alcohol is on ice, and the girls want to relax
Maybe she’ll want to stay and have sexual relations, maybe she won’t
But I’m pretty certain she knows I’m very kinky. Am I right?

[Hook]
And she wants her picture taken with me because I’m a big star
Of course she does, I’m a really big star
You only live once, Sir, or so they say
And I’ve dined in the restaurant named that on many’s the day
It’s in Miami, where I am all the time
And I work hard at this lifestyle, every danged day
And I stay out of it, and the ladies come to me
And I stay to the side, where they pay to sit, where they pay for the prestige
Every danged day, every danged day, I don’t care what they say
I can’t see their disdain because the money blocks my way
Am I right? I’m a real African-American with gangster overtones
Am I right?

[Verse 2: Lil Wayne]
You only live once? That’s not enough for me
I’m taking other fellows out of the game
Just like the Umpire, I’m in charge here
And I’ve got a giant funny cigarette
She was so wet I got lost down there
So I swam to her backside
Don’t forget that I’m from the East Side of New Orleans
The 17th Ward in New Orleans
It’s important for context, so please bookmark the info
I’ll make a bunch of references, it’s that important to me
I’m getting lots of sex, and you should challenge me
I can show off, you’ll see I’m so manly
And we’ll replace the tobacco in the cigarette with this funny stuff, see?
That’s how I live my life, and everything goes better with Mary Jane
But I’m started to feel a wee bit disoriented, okay, very disoriented
And though I might sound silly, I’ll kill you if you mock me
Money talks, and so does Mr. Ed
I’m rich enough to do what I want
But I love cultural references so I mention the horse
And my contract requires me to mention my label, “Young Money”
(Okay, now that’s done)
My gun shoots out bullets non-stop
It’s crazy, sex with women is great, but women are just so-so
It’s amazing, other fellows are out peddling their drugs
Just like women are out trafficking their bodies
So I French kiss my girl in the naughty parts
And—oh my!—the physical response!
And, oh my Heavens, Becky! Look at her posterior!
Lil’ Wayne, I’ll end with your nickname—Tunechi

[Hook]

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